I am awake and getting ready for my day.
Only, I am not just getting ready for my day. I am thinking about a project at work, and if my son has any homework he needs to bring in, and if we are out of milk, and what today's blog post will be about, and the fact I can't seem to catch up on my podcast, and did I just shampoo my hair twice because I wasn't paying attention? and, what am I making for dinner tonight, and...a host of other things.
My BuzzBrain condition continues as I brush my teeth, empty the dishwasher, do laundry, and engage in any fairly mindless activity which doesn't require my immediate attention.
And it doesn't stop. In morning traffic, I think about updating my iPod, and an email I have to send, and that I am pretty sure I see the same cars every day because I recall those stickers on the back, and if I can get away with serving Mexican food for dinner tonight even though we had it a few nights ago, and on and on.
When I have lunch with my husband and I ask him what he is thinking, he says, "Nothing." And I believe him. And I am jealous.
BuzzBrain is taking me away from my family; it's taking me away from the present-tense. And I need to find my way back.
The Social Psychology Quarterly has published a study about context switching being a cause of stress - especially for women. Evidently, the inherent stress of going from formal social contexts (like working for a boss), to less formal situations where authoritative structures change (like being a mom at home) happens more frequently in women then men.
So, after reading this, I can't help but think that my constant switch of one topic to another is also causing me stress. And I don't need that. So, I am on the search for quiet. Like my son, I need to learn to appreciate the silence again (both externally and internally).
So, I am trying to focus on the now. Sure, I pour out my thoughts onto a list, but I am trying to tackle them one at a time. I've rediscovered yoga and am bringing my son along for the ride. So far, he has enjoyed his "special stretching time" with Mommy on the weekends (that kid does a great downward dog), and hopefully, that will be the start of a quiet journey for both of us.
How do you find the quiet when your BuzzBrain takes over? Tell me in the comments.